Log in

No account? Create an account

Sun, Jun. 8th, 2008, 09:04 pm

i havent written in awhile. i dont know, nothing really new to write about. some stuff happened in my favor. im going to boston finally and savings has been building. so im not as stressed about stuff anymore. i kinda work almost everyday and just chill out at night. which i dont mind. but everyone around me thinks its a shitty life. i really dont think so.
i always say to each his own and i dont judge my friends for all their actions. especially the ones recently. i mean i judged a little with lindsay and deanna being friends with gwen again. only because the girl is a complete bitch who called deanna a skanky hoe and purposely said shit to lindsay that made her cry. and she gave me fucking grief cause a guy who was in love with her but she never gave him the time of day, flirted with me for one night. i decided that im not gonna put up a front and pretend to be nice anymore. i dont have energy for that shit.
i dont know, i guess i jut grew a lot quicker than them. i had my wild drunken nights and stupid fights with fake friends and my over dramatic one week romances with boys. for some people, those phases last longer. but im over it. i kinda laugh when they tell me these stories but ya know i tell them what i learned from my experiences and be there for them. but its up to a point where im like, "get the fuck over it"
im also loving the fact that everyone i talk to and catch up with is like, "youre still single??" well cause i choose to be all the way. im not saying i have all these guys that like me but i know that there have been openings but i just avoided it. i like doing my own thing and not really having to worry about what another person needs from me. im still working on me and thats important. i dont really get lonely or sad that i dont have a boy to run to. im not really a dependent person. i mean obvs if a guy comes along and blows me away thats one thing. but i have such weird standards for boys that i doubt ill meet that boy here on long island. i just meet clones every where i go. and i say long island cause everyone new person i met this past month, even from far east, as connections to someone i know. and that is a standard, you cant know the people ive been associated with for far too long.

i cant wait for tuesday when i have off. im hoping the nice weather keeps up so i can go to the beach finally and maybe gain some color. i gotta work out too. for now, sleeeep.